“And so did those who may have let you down.”
I love this.
So did they.
Have you ever listened to yourself when you are complaining about someone or something else? I have. I spew a litany of, “I/we did/do this, this, this, this, this and all he/she/they did/do was that!’ A verbal scorecard of my own many great positives (interspersed with expletives, of course; it’s me I’m talking about), to compare with his/her/their great many negatives (and even better expletives).
I gave him the best years of my life …
I suffered through 19 hours of labor for her (without drugs!) …
We worked harder on this than they did …
Sound familiar?
I have to point out here, first, that anything we do for anyone, we do by choice.
This includes believing in someone, something, or what is said.
(One good thing about thinking that way is that being able to reduce what we perceive to be a negative experience as a 'bad choice' on our part, rather than blaming someone else, allows us to still remain in control and not fall into the 'victim' thinking that gives our power away. We still hold our own.)
(One good thing about thinking that way is that being able to reduce what we perceive to be a negative experience as a 'bad choice' on our part, rather than blaming someone else, allows us to still remain in control and not fall into the 'victim' thinking that gives our power away. We still hold our own.)
(Let that one percolate for a moment.)
This Note covers so much, in so few words. There are lessons in forgiveness, acceptance, perspective, equality … judgment and expectations.
When we feel let down by someone, our focus is only on our own self, and what we feel was done to us.
“I did my best.”
And so did they.
That’s quite an on/off switch, isn’t it? If we looked at it that way, and then tried to compile our scorecard, it would be a list of judgments in a way that said, “I am/do better than he/she/they.”
How many times have we also used the “I did my best” when we were called on for coming up short? When someone was disappointed in us, or when someone said we let them down?
And so did they.
Are we completely happy with everything we’ve ever done? Have we ever let someone else down?
Should we be forgiven for what we’ve done? Should we be accepted for who we are?
When we make a choice to work hard at something, believe in someone or something, is our choice based on expectation? Do we tryonly for gain? Being kind, nice, loving … are these things we do only for what we get in return? Or worse, to control someone else?
I have realized that the idea of acceptance of others goes much further than I had thought. The bottom line (so far) that I’ve come to is that I have to allow for others what I expect for/from myself.
I want to be forgiven if I’ve hurt someone. I have to forgive those that I feel have hurt me.
We are all human. I will admit that my best on some days is better than others. As I get older and learn more, that 'best' gets better. “They” might go through the same thing, don’t you think?
I want to live my life the way I want, having my own freedom of choice. Regarding others, I have to allow them that same freedom of choice, even if that includes not choosing what I say, think, believe … or not choosing me.
After all, I've made choices like that, haven't I?
After all, I've made choices like that, haven't I?
I know that my own actions are based on what I am feeling and how I believe. So are theirs.
I should always try to do my best. Always. (Do I? Not yet.)And I should do this just because I want to, and not for compensation.
(Keep in mind, being kind, nice, and loving is its own reward: it feels good.)
Because I know whatever happens, at the end of the day – whatever kind of day I’ve had – I’m going to say:
I did my best.
… and so will they.
***** I absolutely love getting these Notes. Every day they give me something to think about! Thank you, Dooley brothers! (www.Tut.com)
For the record, the Universe is ALWAYS speaking to me. Some times I just need an obvious method of delivery to listen! :)
For the record, the Universe is ALWAYS speaking to me. Some times I just need an obvious method of delivery to listen! :)
Happy 3rdAnniversary, 40-something Breck Girl Blog! Happy Anniversary to me!
3/20/13 – 3/20/16
3/20/13 – 3/20/16
No comments:
Post a Comment